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earlybloomingparenthesesI had two episodes left of season 3 of The Magicians when I found out, last night, about the season 4 finale (and then immediately went on dreamwidth to see what the people I trust had to say about it, and, yikes). Ironically, I had just given myself a talking to about how it was weird that I was not letting myself get fully emotionally invested in The Magicians because while the show can be a bit of a mess and doesn't always do a great job with stuff, on the whole, it seemed not to be on track to do anything super shitty/emotionally devastating.
ha ha ha
And I'm...confused, a little? Definitely by what happened given the trajectory and philosophy of the show so far, but also by feeling like I'm grieving, to some extent? Considering that I have withheld deep emotional attachment to the show. Given that I've been watching it fairly slowly and have not even finished season 3, let alone seen the finale of season 4. And confused because...is this...really...still...happening? Like, I think I'm pretty realistic about how
about how bad queer people have it, despite neoliberal appearances to the contrary (i.e. gay marriage=no homophobia). And it's not like I trust, like Marvel or Disney (lol they're the same company) to do any sort of good storytelling around queer people. But like...I guess I thought...were people who write for networks like SyFy not paying attention to, like, the Lexa disaster? Or like...just...everything? From the past several decades of queer characters? Are we really still killing off queer characters in shitty tired trope-y ways on TV shows that explicitly take the position of being progressive?
Yes. Yes, we are. And I feel a little dumb? For thinking that this, or something like this, was not going to happen? I wasn't wildly optimistic, but I was...cautiously optimistic. Not that The Magicians was always, like, Good Queer Representation (which is not a term I love in the first place but boy is this the time to use it), but their basic premise did seem to be that shit is shitty and yet we continue on and so I thought that at least that would...continue on. Plus they seem to, like, try to write mental illness and trauma well? Generally?
Anyway, now I'm just flopping around feeling sad and let down, largely, I think, because I have been looking for a show to get into that's still airing and lol that was a bad choice. Maybe I'll rewatch season 1 of Killing Eve, which I did like but didn't get super invested in, but I'm really here for ensemble shows...sigh. (RIP Orphan Black, and Hannibal, and Black Sails.) I didn't really need to ramble on about this--I think I thought I'd say something thoughtful and eloquent about grief and television shows and queer detachment and attachment or something but blehhhhhhhhhh
is really my takeaway.
ha ha ha
And I'm...confused, a little? Definitely by what happened given the trajectory and philosophy of the show so far, but also by feeling like I'm grieving, to some extent? Considering that I have withheld deep emotional attachment to the show. Given that I've been watching it fairly slowly and have not even finished season 3, let alone seen the finale of season 4. And confused because...is this...really...still...happening? Like, I think I'm pretty realistic about how
about how bad queer people have it, despite neoliberal appearances to the contrary (i.e. gay marriage=no homophobia). And it's not like I trust, like Marvel or Disney (lol they're the same company) to do any sort of good storytelling around queer people. But like...I guess I thought...were people who write for networks like SyFy not paying attention to, like, the Lexa disaster? Or like...just...everything? From the past several decades of queer characters? Are we really still killing off queer characters in shitty tired trope-y ways on TV shows that explicitly take the position of being progressive?
Yes. Yes, we are. And I feel a little dumb? For thinking that this, or something like this, was not going to happen? I wasn't wildly optimistic, but I was...cautiously optimistic. Not that The Magicians was always, like, Good Queer Representation (which is not a term I love in the first place but boy is this the time to use it), but their basic premise did seem to be that shit is shitty and yet we continue on and so I thought that at least that would...continue on. Plus they seem to, like, try to write mental illness and trauma well? Generally?
Anyway, now I'm just flopping around feeling sad and let down, largely, I think, because I have been looking for a show to get into that's still airing and lol that was a bad choice. Maybe I'll rewatch season 1 of Killing Eve, which I did like but didn't get super invested in, but I'm really here for ensemble shows...sigh. (RIP Orphan Black, and Hannibal, and Black Sails.) I didn't really need to ramble on about this--I think I thought I'd say something thoughtful and eloquent about grief and television shows and queer detachment and attachment or something but blehhhhhhhhhh
is really my takeaway.
